INXS Calling All Nations: A Fan History of INXS
On October 3, 2023, INXS published a book called “Calling All Nations-A Fan History of INXS.” A portion of my history with INXS is in this book. The book by itself seems to be sold out and only available to buy from eBay and online used bookstores.
Around November 2022, INXS put out on social media that they were looking for stories for the new book.
I submitted a photo of me and Garry Gary Beers that was taken after this show and I wrote about the show itself. Most of what happened that day did not end up in the book because I already knew by then that my story was not well-received in many INXS circles, so I didn’t tell it all. Too much truth. Too much negativity. Not enough reverence or worship. My contribution is on page 76 in the book.
From Toronto to Ottawa City
It’s about a four-and-a-half-hour drive from Toronto to Ottawa City. Assuming that our check-out time was 11 am and we stopped somewhere for lunch, we would have arrived at our hotel in Ottawa City around 4:30 pm.
Barrymore’s Music Hall
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barrymore%27s
We arrived at Barrymore’s on Bank Street around 5 pm and parked the Suburban in the parking lot across the street from the club on Gilmour Street. No one else was there so we took a walk and looked around.
Garry’s laundry
When we passed by a laundromat, one of us recognized one of Garry Gary’s shirts that he wears onstage. It was tumbling in a dryer. So, there were people who worked for INXS around. Down the street from the club there was a coffee shop. We went in and sat down for a bit.
Tommy needs cocaine
At some point we bumped into Tommy who was either the driver for the band’s equipment or for the roadies, and we chatted with him for a while. I don’t remember what we talked about. What I wrote in my diary was that Tommy had to leave because he needed to buy cocaine. He had to drive to Montreal after the show that night and needed it to stay awake.
Waiting in the parking lot for INXS
Terri, Jess and I walked back to the parking lot to wait for INXS to arrive in their tour bus. There was a man there who was the parking lot attendant, so we chatted with him for a while. We told him about our trip to see INXS in concert for three nights in a row and that we had seen them a bunch of times. He told us we were sick for following them around. That seems to be a common opinion. Maybe we were!
INXS arrives
The INXS tour bus pulled into the parking lot around 6:30 pm. It was still daytime. Sunset wasn’t until 8:30 pm. We were still bored because the band stayed on the bus.
I stood there and looked at the bus, but I could not see inside at all. But then, I saw Chris Murphy, the manager, put his face very close to the window and he looked at me. Then he disappeared and appeared again with a 35mm camera which he held up to the window. He took a photo of me. It wasn’t until recently that I thought anything of it other than, “huh, that was weird.”
Why did Chris Murphy take my photo?
But then the Covid-19 pandemic happened in 2019. I was stuck at home with time to read my diary, and INXS came back into my life in a big way. Since then, I have been trying to understand what happened and I thought about why Chris Murphy would take my photo.
It seems clear that Michael Hutchence was sitting next to the window and looking at me and Michael asked Chris Murphy to take my photo with his camera.
Playing with a baseball bat
I walked away and found something to play with near the attendant’s booth. There was a baseball bat which I picked up, and I twirled it and swung it around. After swinging at a bunch of pitches while pretending to be at bat in the batter’s box like in a major league game, I put it down and picked up the broom that was there.
Michael must have been watching from inside the bus when I put the rounded end of the broomstick on the pad of my index finger. In order to keep the broom balanced on the end of my finger, I had to move my feet around kind of like I was dancing. The broom stayed up for what seemed like a long time.
Michael Hutchence comes over to play
The next thing I knew, Michael Hutchence was off the bus and standing next to us. He wanted to try what I was doing so I gave him the broom. When it turned out that he could balance the broom on his finger as well as I could, I said, “No fair! Your finger is bigger than mine.” I used the side of my body to shove the side of his body. Like I was a hockey player or the bishop from the Monty Python sketch. Pretending to be the bishop was something I did in the halls of my high school.
Monty Python’s The Bishop
It’s impossible to say exactly what happened next. When I wrote in my diary, it was often just a bunch of snippets of detail in no particular order. I’m trying to fit these together into a more cohesive story as best as I can.
More of the band members came off the bus and we found out from one of them that they did not have a hotel. We had a hotel room in town so Jess offered to drive some of them to our hotel so they could use our room, but the offer was declined.
Hanging around with Tim Farriss
The Suburban had a CB radio and a public address loudspeaker. When I was sitting in the front seat of the car, I switched on the PA, picked up the hand mic, and startled Tim Farriss by announcing his name “Tim Farriss” over the public address system while he was standing in the parking lot in front of the car.
That led to Tim wanting to play with the CB radio. The tour bus was equipped with a CB radio too. It was up by the driver’s seat. Jess and Tim figured out a CB radio channel to use and then Tim went into the bus and talked to Jess over the radio. They had fun.
You can see part of the Suburban and the tour bus from this photo that Jess took of Tim and Terri.
Terri and Michael Hutchence
Terri also had her picture taken with Michael. I didn’t buy a copy of that photo because Timmy was her favorite, so I bought the one with her and Timmy instead. Terri called Michael over, “Michael, come take a photo with me!” Michael was trying to be funny and was acting coquettish and like he was a prostitute and he said, “The $100 one-here in public?”
Garry Gary’s creepy experience
At some point we were standing around and chatting with Garry Gary Beers. He told us that he was very drunk at the Pizza A Go Go. When we were chatting with him in that club after the show at the Beacon Theatre in New York City, I didn’t get the impression that he was drunk. Garry told us that the next morning he woke up in an apartment that belonged to a woman he didn’t know, and he couldn’t remember how he got there or what happened.
I think he blamed that on his drinking but I when I heard that, I thought this woman must have put something in his drink because he did not seem blackout drunk when we left the club.
Michael wants a kiss
There was another thing that happened, and I think it happened before the show and not after. Terri, Jess and I were standing around and talking to each other when Michael walked up to me from my left and said to me, “I want a kiss.” Either I didn’t hear him, or it was something I was too surprised to process.
Michael was very soft spoken but also, now that I am old, I’m almost deaf in my left ear. Perhaps, the loss of hearing in that ear had already begun. In any case, I didn’t understand what he said so I said, “What?” and he said it again. “I want a kiss.”
That time I heard him, but I didn’t respond because I was thinking about it. Unfortunately for me, I had caught herpes simplex, the kind of herpes that causes cold sores on the lips, when I was around nine years old. I had enough experience with it that I knew I had a cold sore coming on. It just wasn’t visible yet.
Then there was the situation where I would be kissing Michael in front of my friends again and this time it would also be in front of the band and Kirk Pengilly.
When I didn’t respond right away to Michael’s demand, he went ahead and kissed me on the cheek. Problem solved! I didn’t reject him or give him herpes. I’m not sure if we stood around for a bit or if Michael just went away.
On the guest list
INXS eventually went into Barrymore’s through the back, and we did not. Gary Grant put us on the guest list, so we didn’t have to pay when they opened the doors for the customers and we went in.
My diary says that Barrymore’s was a dive but does not give details. From what I recall, there was a stage and an area where people could dance. The rest of the place was full of tables. The tables nearest the stage were round and seated about six people. There were only three or four. I don’t remember what the tables further back were like or how many there were.
The three of us sat down at a table near the front and chatted with a couple of young women also at our table who had seen INXS play in Sydney. That’s all I remember about them.
INXS started playing and everyone was sitting down
Everyone in the club was sitting down when INXS came out and started the show. The band was not happy about that. We should have been the first ones to get up and dance, but we were not. A couple of people at another table were the first to stand up and dance to the music and we followed them.
Michael and Timmy were trying to get people up and dancing any way they could. Michael said, “We don’t do sit down shows in Australia” and then told the audience, “You can put your books down now.”
Timmy was not happy
We were already out of our seats when Timmy used his microphone and said, “We’re not necrophiliacs, you know. We don’t like fucking dead people.” My mouth dropped open in shock when I heard that because that was the last thing I was expecting to hear. Then I laughed because it was funny. Jess didn’t understand so I spoke into her ear and told her what necrophilia is.
Timmy was angry that the audience was being so unenthusiastic and acting dead. We approached the table in front of us and urged the people sitting there to get up and dance with us. And they did. But there were only a dozen people who got up and danced near the stage.
There are many people in the world who would have loved a chance to see INXS perform up close like that. The people sitting in the club having drinks that night were not those people.
A guy is ejected from the club
INXS lost one member of the audience that night when a young man walked up to the stage carrying a bottle of gin. After the guy handed the bottle to Michael Hutchence, he was immediately thrown out of the club.
We had fun dancing and sweating but I would not call it one of the best shows. The shows that have a larger, more enthusiastic audience are the best shows. There is more positive energy flowing then.
Back to the parking lot
After the show was over, we went back to the parking lot and waited near the bus along with a few other people from the show, including the guy who had been thrown out. It was dark by then.
Oh my god, it’s Gary Grant!
Gary Grant and Chris Murphy came out of the club first because they were doing their jobs as managers. When I saw Gary Grant, I said, “Aren’t you Gary Grant?” When he said, “Yes”, I said, “Oh my god!” To which he replied, “Fuck off!” I loved Gary Grant for that. When I took the piss with him, he gave it right back to me.
My photo with Garry Gary Beers
Garry Gary came over to us and said, “Thanks for coming, especially tonight.” We were great fans, if I do say so myself!
Both Jess and I took the opportunity to have our photos taken with Garry Gary. When I was standing next to Garry, it was clear that I was taller than him. He commented, “Are you still growing?” I think I was wearing my white sandals that only had about a half inch heel.
In response to his annoying remark about my height, I slipped off my shoes and then bent my knees and scrunched down a little so I would be his height. Cuz, fuck you! Dudes suck.
When it seemed that Garry got my point, I stood up a little straighter for the photo but not to my full height, so I don’t look my actual height in the photo. This is the photo that is in the Calling All Nations book.
Here is the photo of Jess and Garry
Way to be!
I saw that there was a guy talking to Michael and it was the guy who had been kicked out of the club, so I went over to them and said, “You’re the guy who got kicked out!” Then I extended my hand for a handshake. We shook hands and I said, “Way to be!” If I recall correctly, I walked away again and paid no attention to Michael.
Jackie was in the Bahamas
Next, we said hello to Jon and told Jon that Jackie Fuhrmann was sorry that she couldn’t be here with us because her parents had forced her to go to the Bahamas with them. He laughed and was like, “Oh no, poor Jackie!” because it was quite ridiculous. Then he said, “I wish I was in the Bahamas right now!”
My photo with Michael Hutchence
All of the photos I ever took with any members of INXS were taken on this day after the show.
Those photos were with Garry Gary and with Michael. Terri was the one who said, “I want to take a photo you two together” to me and Michael. So, we came together but we never actually posed.
We stood next to each other, and Michael put his arm around my waist while I put my arm around his shoulder, but then we started looking at each other and talking. And there was nothing Terri could do to get us to look at the camera. She got tired of waiting and just snapped the photo.
I’m not sure how long we were standing there talking. When we remembered that we were supposed to have our photo taken, we turned to look forward and Terri was gone! After that, we went our separate ways.
INXS leaves for Montreal
You can see from the photo that Michael was drinking a beer. The band stayed in the parking lot with some fans for the time it took to have a beer but then INXS had to leave for the next city and the next concert.
The bus drove off to Montreal that night and we drove back to our hotel in Ottawa. We drove to Montreal the next morning where INXS had a hotel, and we did not. Someone must have told us where they would be staying in Montreal because we drove straight there the next day.
