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  • Blog Post Two- INXS concert, The Ritz. May 21, 1983, NYC.

    Donna and her friends outside a concert venue in New Jersey before an INXS concert

    The photo is of me and my friends before an INXS concert in 1984. I want to introduce the people in it. Jess is not in the photo because she was taking it. I met Jess through Terri. Terri is third from the left, wearing the purple shirt. Terri and I met in the seventh grade when I moved to Hillsdale, New Jersey. Jess, Terri and I met a few years later because of a mutual interest in soccer and the New York Cosmos. Jess lived in Wayne, New Jersey.

    Jess, Susan (fourth from the left, between Terri and me), and Dana (far right, wearing the Relax t-shirt) can be seen in the Wham documentary that is on Netflix. add link? They are in the footage from an autograph signing at Sam Goody at the Willowbrook Mall in New Jersey. I was at school in Philadelphia, so I wasn’t there.

    @luindriel

    When you show up in the Wham documentary on @Netflix ! #wham #whamdocumentary #80smusic

    ♬ original sound – Susan

    Maria, first on the left in the photo, was a fan of Kirk Pengilly, same as me. We met her at an INXS concert earlier in 1984. I think we also met Susan at a different INXS concert or maybe she was a friend of Dana’s. I don’t remember. Dana had some kind of INXS fan club going. I think it was called INXS Alliance. We either met her because of that or at an INXS concert. Jess, Terri, and Dana all saw INXS open for Adam Ant at St. John’s University in April of 1983 and met members of the band but I don’t think they met each other.

    Jen, second from the right, lived in Tampa, Florida which is where Terri went to college. Jen also had an interest in soccer and music. I don’t know how Terri and Jen met. It’s possible that they were pen pals long before Terri went to Florida. 

    What I remember most about the day Terri, Jess and I went to the Ritz to see INXS in concert was how tired and uncomfortable I was. We didn’t just go there for the show. We went early (around 3pm) and waited on the steps in front of the Ritz for the band to show up for soundcheck.

    My mother’s future second husband owned the Ho-Ho-Kus Bakery and he gave me a job there during the summer between high school and my freshman year of college. Now I had just come back home from finishing freshman year of college and I worked at the bakery that morning from 6am until 1pm. 

    Ad from Waldwick High School yearbook from 1984 for HoHoKus Bakery in New Jersey.

    We were eating while sitting on the steps when INXS showed up for soundcheck. Tim Farriss, the guitarist, said, “Are you having a picnic?” I was wearing a sleeveless shirt with a blue diamond pattern and long pants. Jon Farriss, the drummer, looked me up and down when he passed me and he said, “Hi!” I said, “Hi!” back. I didn’t mind because I thought Jon Farriss was the best-looking and sexiest guy in the band. But we weren’t there for that. Nothing else happened as far as I can remember. 

    The band left and we still had hours to wait. I had to pee, so we pleaded with the doorman to let us in to use the bathroom. When I got in there I couldn’t go. Either my bladder was shy, or I was holding it too long. I couldn’t stay in there for long so I went back outside and had to wait a few more hours before I could try again. It was not fun. I thought I damaged something in my body. 

    We were first in line so when the doors opened, we took spots up against the stage. We still had to wait for a while. I was able to use the bathroom successfully. What a relief! We met another girl named Donna- Donna B while we were waiting for the show to start. We went to future shows with her too and she is also part of my story.

    First the opening act, New Models, took the stage. I was so tired that I put my head down on the stage while they were playing. I was oblivious until Terri tapped my arm and told me to get up. I looked up to find the lead singer jumping up and down two inches from my head. I think he was trying to wake me up. 

    INXS came on and I listened and watched- no sleeping. They were good. I liked them. A couple of times when Michael Hutchence, the lead singer, was in front of me, I touched the top of his shoe with my index finger. No screaming, nothing crazy, just a tap with my finger.

    Later on during the show, Michael drank some water from a glass Tropicana orange juice bottle and then handed it to me. I was thirsty so I drank some water and then passed the bottle to Terri. She drank and then passed the bottle to Jess and she drank. They passed the bottle back to me and I drank the rest of the water and then kept the bottle as a souvenir. I threw the bottle away a few years later.

    We hung around near the stage after the show and the band came out onto the floor. I don’t remember anything about that except that Kirk Pengilly (guitar, vocals, saxophone) was standing around and I took a close look at the back of his head. He had very short hair in back and there were zig zag designs cut into his hair there. He turned around and said, “Hi!” I said hi and told him that I liked his haircut. He said, “thanks.” 

    I have no idea what time it was exactly, but I would have been awake for close to 24 hours at that point. I don’t know how long it took me to write anything down from this night. If I was really busy, I would just jot down notes and not write out the whole story until later. I was probably too tired to remember much. Maybe Terri or Jess talked to some of them. I don’t remember. We made it back to New Jersey without incident. I don’t remember who drove. I just know it wasn’t me because I didn’t have a car. I could use my mother’s car to drive to work but that’s it. Terri had her own car- a little Datsun, back when those existed!

  • Blog Post One- How Did This Happen?

    The first thing I want to do with this blog is to tell my story about what happened with the Australian rock band INXS (pronounced in excess). These experiences are the basis for many subjects I want to write about. 

    I didn’t talk about it for many years for reasons that I now think are wrong. Women are silent because they are shamed, disbelieved, attacked, and because they are taught to protect men. I want this to change.

    Jackie with Jon Farris of INXS in 1983

    I may never have talked about it if it weren’t for my friend, Jackie Fuhrmann, and the COVID-19 pandemic. Jackie died unexpectedly in September 2023. She was two years younger than me. She was an INXS fan. Her favorite band member was Jon Farriss, the drummer.

    Jackie lived in Chicago. She was born and raised there. I was from New Jersey. I met her through my local New Jersey friends, Terri and Jessica. Jackie came out to New Jersey to visit and sometimes my friends went to the Midwest to visit her. I never did. I still have never visited Chicago. Jackie loved soccer and music. She first saw INXS in concert in 1983 in Chicago. She visited us in New Jersey in the summer of 1984 and saw several INXS concerts. Jackie was one of my three friends who Michael Hutchence, the lead singer of INXS, invited up to his hotel room on July 2/3, 1984. Terri and Jessica were the other two. More about that in a future post.

    Facebook allowed us to reconnect after we had lost touch with each other. Jackie followed some INXS fan pages. She became Facebook friends with many of the other fans in those Facebook groups. She enjoyed remembering the fun times.

    In 2018, Jackie started tagging me in posts that were about INXS and in September 2019, I joined one of the INXS fan groups on Facebook that she was in. 

    I had stopped paying attention to the latest news about INXS and I rarely talked about them. Sometimes I would mention that I went to 22 INXS concerts if I needed to say something about myself during an ice breaker at a social event- a common practice at military spouse events where people often don’t know each other because we move so often. Sometimes I would mention that I had met the band, but I never told the whole story. I was embarrassed about the things we did, and I didn’t like to talk about it. I didn’t want to be thought of as a groupie because that was not true. Groupie has a sexual aspect to it as opposed to being a fan. And it is sexist because it is a word that describes women and is meant to denigrate them. 

    I started to read the posts from this INXS Facebook group that showed up in my feed. I still remembered a lot from my life in the 1980s and many of the posts jogged my memory. For example, I had forgotten that Bruce Patron existed until I watched a video from 1986. He was in it, and I recognized him immediately. Bruce Patron was the tour manager for INXS during their Listen Like Thieves tour. I started to comment on the posts with details I remembered.

    Then the COVID-19 pandemic happened. I was living in Honolulu, Hawaii and almost all social activity came to a halt in March 2020. That left me with a lot of free time. I started to read my diary with the intention of sharing my stories about INXS with the INXS Facebook group I was in. I started out by posting stories about what happened in 1983 in April 2020. At first it was fun but then it became disturbing because I noticed things I had not noticed before and it brought back memories from a difficult time in my life. 

    https://www.facebook.com/mystifymh

    Richard Lowenstein made a documentary about Michael Hutchence called Mystify: Michael Hutchence. It was released in the U.S. in January 2020, but I didn’t watch it until after I finished reading my diary, so not until May 2020. As I told my friend, Jessica, it brought up a lot of shit for me. Questions that I have been trying to answer ever since. 

    I have been trying to establish what is fact and what is fiction. Obviously, I don’t doubt my own experiences. I was there. It happened to me. But because other people do doubt me, I am turning to every source I can find to establish what happened and when. As they say, the devil is in the details, and I plan to turn the vague recollections of people who were there into a clear picture.

    Right now, I am reading a biography by Vincent Lovegrove called Michael Hutchence: A Tragic Rock ‘N’ Roll Story- A Definitive Biography. I think it is out of print. It came out in 1999 and it made Patricia and Tina angry. They say so in their book. I plan to read as many books as I can find so I can gather information and find different versions of events and then determine what is most likely to be true. I will tell you about all the books and videos I come across.